Looking for a funny fart t-shirt? You found the right website. FartMerch is stacked with fart shirts for people who never grew out of the joke: gross-out classics, nerdy puns, dinosaurs, axolotls, and enough dad energy to power a minivan. Fresh this season: a whole new batch of office-hazard, incident-report, and public-offender tees.
Every tee, hoodie, and sweatshirt below is a design we picked because it made someone laugh out loud. They are printed on demand by TeePublic, and each product page here sends you there to choose your size and color. Want a gift instead? Our Christmas fart gift guide has you covered.
Gross-Out Classics
The funniest fart shirts say it out loud. No metaphors, no apologies, just a punchline that lands from across the room.
- Diarrhea Derek FART Tee – a parody trading-card design starring one unforgettable bathroom emergency.
- Pootin’ Penelope Tee – recess turned into a full-blown emergency, in glorious retro style.
- Ok, Who Sharted? Tee – bold red text and a question every group chat has asked.
- I FART in Your General Direction Tee – a medieval heckler, for people who quote movies at inappropriate times.
- Who Cut the Cheese? Creamery Label Tee – an artisan creamery label: origin unmistakable, aged since lunch, pairs well with open windows.
- Sometimes It’s a Scream Fart Tee – a volume meter that climbs from whisper to talk to shout to scream, because sometimes it really is a scream.
Nerdy & Clever Fart Shirts
If you want a laugh and a little credit for being clever, these science, word, and pun tees do both.
- FART Machine – Smart FART Methane Tee – CH4 glowing in FartMerch green, hiding inside the word “machine.” Chemistry teachers will understand.
- Largest Source of Natural Gas Tee – a hazard diamond rating flammability, health risk, and reactivity. Engineers and dads, rejoice.
- Fartled Definition Tee – fartled (adj.): startled by the sound of your own fart. A clean dictionary entry for word nerds.
- Tarot: The Fart Tee – Card XIII: The Fart. Reversed: a shart. A witchy pick for spooky-season fans.
- Giving a Crap Meter Tee – a dial gauge sitting at zero. Recent output: one fart. You’re welcome.
- “I FARTed BigTime” in Morse Code Tee – people will ask what it says. The answer is worse.
- NASA Fart Joke Tee – how does NASA pass gas? Ass-teroids, on a baseball tee.
Office Hazards & Public Offenders
Fresh designs for the coworker who makes the meeting memorable and the friend who never admits it. Official-looking paperwork, zero accountability.
- Fart Happens Incident Report Tee – cause, witnesses, and who to blame (the dog, obviously). Severity: loud.
- Gas Leak: Evacuate Tee – an emergency sign with hazard stripes. Step one, hold your breath. Step four, do not ask who.
- Wanted for Farting in Public Tee – a wanted poster: armed, gassy, and last seen near the break room. Reward: one open window.
- If They Talk Behind Your Back, Fart Tee – an anti-gossip protocol: detect, turn away slowly, deploy, walk, do not run.
- If You Can Read This You’re in Fart Range Tee – a crosshair scope reads range 3 ft, target you, status armed. Aim upwind.
- Superpower: Fart & Walk Away Tee – a classified agent file rating Stealth, Stench, Getaway Speed, and zero Accountability.
- Nobody Listens Until I Fart Tee – a deadpan graph: attention flat, then suddenly the whole room is listening.
- Park Rules: No Farting Tee – no sneaky ones, no blaming the dog. Violators will be smelled.
- High Mileage: Every Fart Is a Gamble Tee – a service ticket with an expired warranty and a check-engine light that never turns off.
Love Language & Wild West Outlaws
For couples, Valentine’s pranksters, and anyone who tells it like it is.
- My Love Language Is Farting Tee – checked: farting, because it means I trust you.
- Air Mail: A Kiss From My Butt Tee – priority kiss, handle with care. Delivered silently.
- Breakin’ Hearts, Rippin’ Farts Tee – an Old West poster promising one night only, free admission, and no ventilation.
Animals, Dinosaurs & Cute Fart Tees
Adorable creatures with terrible manners are the funniest kind. These are fan favorites for pet lovers and dino kids of every age.
- JURASSIC FART Tee – a pterodactyl rocketing through the sky on pure prehistoric gas.
- FARTsalotl Tee – a cute axolotl that farts maybe a little too much.
- Baby FARTsalotl Tee – the tiny, adorable, slightly stinky version. Voted cutest axolotl shirt on planet Earth.
- Caveman FART Joke Tee – what do you call a caveman fart? A blast from the past.
- My Cat’s FARTs Smell Like Milk Tee – for pet owners who have accepted the truth.
Holiday & Gift-Ready Fart Shirts
Need a gag gift shirt for him, her, or the white elephant swap? These are made for opening on Christmas morning.
- Voted Most Likely to FART on Santa’s Lap Tee – the funny Christmas shirt for the family comedian.
- Pull My Mitten – Santa’s Naughty List World Tour, sold out, in green on black. A cheeky twist and a lot of holiday cheer.
- World’s Best Farter (I Mean Father) Tee – an official Award of Excellence for dad, with a certified seal and ribbon.
- Born to Fart, Forced to Behave Tee – a round badge confession for anyone who has to behave at the family dinner.
- Grumpy Old FART Tee – the gift for dad or grandpa, who has earned his complaining rights.
Fart Hoodies & Sweatshirts
When it is cold out, you can still be loud. Cozy layers with a smaller dose of regret.
- FARTs Are Always Funny Hoodie – cozy proof of a universal truth.
- Just FART and Nod Sweatshirt – the entire philosophy, on a crewneck.
- POE-etic Justice Hoodie – Edgar Allan Poe with an evil grin and a very dark joke.
See Every Fart Shirt
Want the whole lineup? Browse every design in our apparel category, or visit the official FartMerch store on TeePublic to filter by shirt style and color.
Fart Shirt FAQ
Who makes the fart shirts?
The designs are ours. TeePublic prints and ships them on demand, so styles, sizes, and prices are shown there at checkout.
Are these funny fart t-shirts a good gift?
Yes. A fart tee is a classic gag gift for dad, grandpa, coworkers, and anyone with a sense of humor. Check our gift guide for more ideas.
Do you have kids’ or women’s fart shirts?
Many designs are available in a range of styles on TeePublic. Open a design and check the available fits and sizes before you order.
From the FartMerch shelf: pair a tee with our own book, the FART Log, a 90-day fart journal written and published by FartMerch.
Can’t pick? Start with Diarrhea Derek or FART Machine. You will not regret either.